Guilt

One word. One word that’s been on my mind a lot lately this year. It’s only five letters, but man can it pack a punch. There are three major areas of my life and I imagine that if you’re reading this, you share at least one of them.

SLP Guilt: This is the guilt you feel if you take a personal day. Or if you miss too many sessions because you have to be in meetings. Or if you don’t feel like you’re using enough “fun” therapy materials. Or if you lose your patience with a few students. I’m sure it happens to all of us. This year, I’ve made a conscious effort to not let it get the best of me. I have been trying to leave my work laptop at work any weekend I can. I only bring it home on the weekdays if I’m absolutely backed up with evaluations or IEPs. We DO NOT have to be perfect SLPs. We just have be the best we can be. It doesn’t mean that we have to live, eat, sleep, and breathe speech.

Mom Guilt: This is the guilt you feel if you give your child the phone/TV time for a little bit after work if you need a few minutes to decompress. Or if you look forward to going to work some days because being at home all day with kid(s) is HARD and work feels less hard sometimes. Or if you lose your patience and have to walk away from the toddler who is screaming for no good reason. This year, I’ve been feeling this a lot. Being a mom is one of the hardest, but most rewarding jobs there is. Being a full time working mom is also hard. Being a stay at home mom is hard. Being a mom is just hard sometimes. I have been trying to make time for myself whenever I can. I go to the gym and run. I go to Target by myself sometimes. And I tell myself that I’m not a bad mom if I do X, Y, or Z as long as it doesn’t become a habit. I’m still very much working on this one.

Family Guilt: This is the guilt you feel if you can’t go to every family function. Or if you live far away from your family so you don’t see them as often. Or if you just want to spend time with your own immediate family. My husband, daughter and I don’t live near any family. It can definitely be hard. We can’t always go to family events because we have to figure in travel time and I can’t be taking off tons of days during the school year to travel. So we don’t go to many things. And you know what? That’s ok. We have to do what works for us. Take care of YOUR little family and YOU first. That is the most important thing.

How do you combat guilt? Leave a comment, I’d love to hear!